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The Four Gates of Speech

In Episode 8, we interviewed William Rodenberg. A huge thank you to him for speaking with us and sharing excellent advice—and for our wonderful logo design.

For today’s Sunset Clarity Segment, I wanted to pass on a short piece of advice that, if followed, could make the world much less scary. It is pivotal advice to maintain happy relationships, whether that is an intimate romantic one or a simple acquaintance. Especially in times of conflict, such as break ups or societal disagreements, we should always closely consider our words and interactions.

A strategy I try to remember is to pass them through something called the four gates of speech. I first saw this advice on an old talk show called “What’s Your Problem?” that aired from 1967 to the mid 1990’s. The host, Benard Meltzer, once said, “Before you speak, ask yourself four quick questions. Those questions are:

Is it true?

Is it kind?

Is it necessary?

Is it helpful?”

If the answer to any of those questions is no, consider leaving your thought unsaid or your action undone

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